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I'm really excited for tonight ! Mimi is going to do phenomenal spinning and I'm excited to see everyone in Oceanside. 

The past few days have been amazing, I haven't been this happy in a very very long time. I mean, both of my presentations sucked, but now I am taking 2 months off of school then interning for the magazine I eventually want to work for for 5 months and I can't believe everything is going how I want it to go. Even though I don't want to jinx anything. And I got my cast off!

Two nights ago was the best night I have had in a very long time. It felt like I was actually getting a "college experience" which is what I have been longing for. I couldn't stop laughing, and I can't believe I have lived next door to this kid for so long and never knew...I might have met someone as funny as my brother. But don't quote me on that. 

Last night I took my Ambien and I was not able to sleep. My ear hurt. Then the pain kept getting worse and worse, so I tried looking up 24hour urgent cares, cause I'd hate to go to the ER for something that sounds so minor. I couldn't find any that opened earlier than 8. I wanted to blow my face off the pain was so bad, so I ended up waking up my Daddy. He took me to the Laguna Beach hospital where i was admitted in 2 seconds, and have an inner ear infection. Which I knew, but I guess having diabetes makes them so much worse which is why I wanted to throw up cause of the pain. So they gave me antibiotics and Vicodin, so now I am attempting to stay awake after being up for 48 hours. Oh and my mom was all, "I'm not saying you're going to have sex tonight, but just to let you know antibiotics cancel out the effects of birth control so be careful" 

Wow. That was weird hearing my mom openly talk about my birth control and letting me in on that fine little detail. Best advice she has given me in my 20 years of life. Maybe she is good for something...we've gotten along all day. I just think it's cause I'm a little high on Vicodin. 

After the hospital I drove to Huntington (on the Vicodin, while nodding off, because my dad didn't tell me not to drive) to Erin's school so she could dye and cut my hair. It was my first haircut in 2 years, and I love the color. And Erin. And her new sugar daddy seems like he's better than all of the pervious ones put together, and seeing her happy with a nice guy made my day that much better.

I'm going to go nap before Mimi gets here. Come play tonight. 

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done. I'm am not happy with it. at all. Now I have to decide what I am going to present to the class. Fuck.

I get an x-ray tomorrow. I hope I can get this fucking thing off. I want to start working again. And be around kids that don't talk about photography, at all. 

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Still haven't done my portfolio. Getting around to it. 

 

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I aint lookin down but I see no one above me..

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oh it hurts to be this good (:

I hustled the pharmacist for more "meds" even though I wasn't supposed to be allowed to get them for another week or so.

I hustled my way out of a red dot.

Now I just gotta hustle Fuller to let me pass. With a B. 

k maybe I'm not that good, but we'll see. 

I'm excited for Friday. And Saturday! I swear Rob T can talk me into anything. 

Now I have to write a paper on diabetes, which should take about 2 seconds. 

It's over. Nobody listens to technoooo

story of my life.

retro cringe

when you remember, the morning after, something you said, wrote, did, didn't say etc. the day before...

'i texted undying love to that chick at the party when I got home..This morning I'm having retro cringe, bigtime..'

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just cause you feel it doesn't mean it's there.

I think I should copy and paste that sentence at least 4357823745873429 times. Or write it out. wow. I can't believe i thought of copying and pasting it before writing it. wow meghan wow.

we're ill.

i'm scared. and fucked.

i like family guy. and dinosaurs in water. and last night.

i'm excited for Friday.

i shouldn't have sold my pharmasuticals. cause i'm still scared. and I now know there's a reason i get enough to make a nice profit every month, it's cause i actually need that much.

i'm a basket case.

my stomach hurts.

hello ambien...

oh and...

Randy is writing my internship thing even though he doesn't work at Brooks anymore<3

ummhm

I'm over my broken foot and having people do things for me/drive me places. I feel bad, although it is probably because I hate driving more than anything and it would be the ultimate inconvenience for me if I had to drive anyone anywhere become of this. Even though I have been reassured it's not a big deal. And for the record, if you broke your foot, I would still drive you.

Things I Have Done While Having a Broken Foot That Were Probably Not a Good Idea:

Rave.

I feel that one should be repeated so...Rave.

Went and saw Del the funky homosapien

Horse the Band

Ran from the gas station to Mimis car out of excitement from Dirty Chips

Not worn my cast

Walked to Rays without my cast

Ran across the street without my cast on to wash my cast

Drove on stuff that's bad for your brain left footed with horrible reflexes

Gone up and down my stairs

Danced

And now I will probably have to wear this thing even longer because I'm a genius and diabetic and not go anywhere because I feel too bad to ask. Thank you for driving me everywhere Mimi. And Rob T. And random people in my classes. 

Now I'm going to go across the street to get it out of the washer and dry it before I have Mimi take me to class round 2. shit smells like shit.

I woke up at 230 because I didn't go to sleep until 8am. Which is always good. I am trying to find a teacher to write my internship recomendation because my GPA is too low to just be able to do it. None of my teachers really remember me so this could be hard, but it'll work out. always does. 

I'm pretty anxious about my portfolio that's due next week, I haven't done any telephoto shots, only wide angle, and I still need a remote shot. But oncew again, I'll make it happen.

but maybe I don't wanna finish anything, anymore.

Best Impulse Decision I Have Ever Made

So last night until 6 this morning I was at Love Groove. Best Valentines day I have ever had. It was sooo much fun. Aside from the fact that the security lady made me throw away my insulin because it involved needles. I'm really heated about it, even though I didn't need to use it when we were there, thank God. I think I'm going to try and contact the person who set up the rave because If I went into a coma because I didn't have my insulin they'd be fucked, even if I can bring a doctor's note or get a really fucking cool diabetic bracelet so they know that my CLEAN needles arn't going to infect anyone with AIDS. They also threw away my birth control and my make up and my chapstick. I really don't understand how you can get massive amount of drugs into a rave, but not my life saving insulin shot thing. Fuck. Okay I'm going to try and get over it...but that was about 200 dollars worth of medication and 30 dollars worth of makeup. Oh and my phone got stolen, which is always good. But Omahr had an extra phone in his car, so I now have one, just minus the sim card. And it's way fucking retro, which will be a nice change from my blackberry (: But all in all, last night was so worth it. 8 Valentines, 32849123858947392 people on drugs, and good music. I just wish Mimi came. And taking my prozac for once (cause I never take that shit, even though it helps with the anxiety. And for the record, It's not prescribed to me for depression) and my xanax after was the most brilliant idea I have ever had. I feel normal, not depressed, just realllly hung over. 

Oh and I am officially a pedofile, but mission accomplished (:

I hate indoor raves. But dgafs.

And we got pulled over on the way back to SB, but it could have been sooooooo much worse than it was. Considering we all had black eyes. 

K so enough about my double life...

I didn't shoot my contest or editorial piece for class. Normally I would really hate myself for not doing it, but I tried to do everything possible to find a contest, and then I did, but it was at Mt. High and Mimi was going to drive me because I can't drive with my broken foot. Then it ended up snowing and Mimi has never been in the snow and doesn't own chains. So then I tried to do a few picture stories on this San Diego skate trip I went on, but all the pictures were of us smoking, eating, skating, driving over and over, so they all look the same. But I'm proud of myself for putting in that much effort to try and make it work even though it didn't. I am improving !

I can now intern from the end of April until September ! That is, if school lets me intern for 2 sessions, I just don't want to pay 5g's every 2 months to take classes I have no interest in. I'd rather pay to work and stare at sugar daddies all day and take head shots of baby boys I have been in love with since day 1. ha. I really need to work on my portraiture skills !

I am still slowly seeing my work improve. I just need to practice with my focusing. I have it down for the most part, but it could be improved.

I'm kind of excited to start working again when I take next session off. I'm so over broken bones...

This post was way too long. 

The end !

blogging withdrawls

So on Thursday Ededdneddie and Steve drove to the real OC to come get me so we could play skateboards. I was a n00b and had trouble finding certain spots, so thank you Vinny for saving our lives <3.>

Yesterday I got my dad to call Mack out of school so we could go skate. We picked up 

Cole at work, and he works at a photo place called "pix and dubs" which made me want to open a store 

called "picks and dimes" (: but it was pouring so we brought the flat bar and just fucked around with that at underground for a while. Basicalluy the car was beaner packed, the rail wouldn't fit in the bed of the truck so we had to stick it through the window, and i was shoved in the back of the truck with my camera equipment 2 boards, the rail in my face, my huge ass cast, Cole's shit, and a bunch of other stuff.  I really need to work on my lighting, but I think it's coming along. And now I am going to attempt to post a picture on how beaner packed it was (:

I took the train back to Sb last night so "guess who's back! back again..."but anyways the train was so packed and everyone was getting teed so it was just like a rager on the train! Then Mimi came ands got me and we went home to play with the baby boys, and I watched her spin. Then Rob T'd and Josh came over and we had a nice little 2am Denny's sesh, where I ate nothing but at least Josh got my sausage. I think. Fuck. I finally fell asleep from 4-6 cause I want to stop Taking my ambien, and I've been pretty productive this morning. I got a lot done this week (for me) so I am rewarding myself by going to Love Groove tonight, so don't talk to me tomorrow, I will be brain dead.

Happy Valentines day! Love you all <3 

it's

always good when your brother ends a phone call with "yeah i'm fine, I'll call you if I get arrested"

<3

mmhm

Mimi is gone, forever and ever. Today was fun though, we went and saw that one movie which kicked my ass and made me dgaf once again! Although, I think the book kicked my ass a little harder...

So we went to my old middle school to take pictures of my brother and Damon skating, then someone got on the intercom saying "Skateboarding and RAZOR scootering are prohibited. You must leave the campus or we will have you arrested in 60 seconds." or something of that nature. But seriously? The intercom? I even told the lady I was alumni...but I guess if you have a generic scooter that's not a Razor you're good to go. Good thing Mack has like, four of them in the bed of his truck. So then we went to play at the bank, and the guy that was supposed to kick us out just told us to wait 5 minutes until his manager left because she was a bitch then we could continue. So I guess we're going to continue tomorrow night. 

And I guess Ryan's kids are going to be around tomorrow, so I'll play skateboards with them too. Or something. 

K I'm going to go shoot up, eat, and pee...

Indie Rock.

I'm sooo happy Mimi is here. And we are getting teed with my dog. And living, laughing, and dgafing ha. So I'm blogging...

I'm so gangsta I eat the cereal without the milk.

I love insulin shots

I'm so excited for my internship, and just asked if I could intern for 4 months instead of 2...so we'll see how that goes. I really hope I can, I like school, but I'd rather drop g's to intern than for some class I don't want to take. 

Rex is way too far away.

I'm almost done with my adult beverage, which is also an issue.

My Grandma thinks I'm going to die like Heath Ledger, which, I mean, If you're going to die on accident, that'd be the way to do it. Wow...I'm not suicidal. at all. 

I refilled my adult beverage.

I might be attached. But I'm not. Fuck that !

Umm I love Mimi. And Rex. You're all right too.

I really like to photograph kids on boards. 

The end. Until I think of something else to entertain you.

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I really like my dog. Love my dog. He is so cute and he follows me around and eats all the food I "accidently" drop on the floor. I want to bring him back to Santa Barbara, but I don't think they'll let him come on the train. I'll tell my landlord that the deposit money Eli never got back is for my dog to be able to live with me. I'm a genius. 

Now I am waiting waiting waiting for MihMih to come visit me in the real OC so we can get teed and practice shot pong for Friday. Not that we need it, but we need to pwn Topher. Especially since the shit talking has already begun. 

I miss the rain.

My right leg has shrunk due to lack of use. And it's noticeable. By the time I get this off I'll have a lolocaust survivor leg and half normal me leg. Yes, I realize that was inappropriate. I don't need a lecture...but in all seriousness, what's a lolocaust? 

I'm going to go play with my dog and wait outside for my brother to get home and for mihmih to come and get teed with me. I'll take a picture or something. I want to go back to San Diego too, that was fun. The little company I shot for made an ad out of one of my pictures (: and apparently there are more to come. So maybe this whole "action sports photographer" that I want to be really is possible. Maybe. All I have to do is continue being cute and taking xanax, and we good...

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i. love. insulin. shots. straight. to. my. dome. 

So glad this whole thing isn't going to run my life as much as it has been. I don't know why I didn't think of this sooner, it's cheaper, works faster, makes it easier to lose weight and it's easier to give yourself a shot than to dry swallow six pills. I can officially eat a real meal. Or, a real Meghan sized meal, which tends to be about 1/3 of what everyone else eats without feeling dazed after. Now I just gotta get a pump ! 

I have no idea why I started this blog, but I kind of like it cause no one reads it, and if you do lurk I like that too. Cause I should get a Masters in lurking, maybe even a Doctorite, or whatever the degree is that doctor's can get.

But anyways...I have nothing to say. Except I wish I was in SB and not having to get fucking bone density tests for my foot this week and have 3 other appointments. Now I can't go to Frisco with Vinny. Shit. I need to get out of here. And I'm excited to take a session off before interning. yeee ! T minus 2 months.

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I finally got put on insulin. Whoever said type 2 diabetics couldn't do that coughgeorgeayoubcough are n00bs. Maybe I'm type 1 1/2 or something... 

I really..

Like San Diego. And playing skateboards with the boys. I actually think my action sports photography is improving. I still have nothing that I am truly proud of, but I think I'm getting there. And I'm sure the internship I just got won't hurt (:

Today

I decided that I don't like riding the train during the day. But I do like having my brother pick me up and tell me funny stories about how he almost died on the way to get me.

"no, actually I'm 15 and just got my permit, and your mom's in the back"

sup

baby